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Coffee
Started by Marius-Zalistupid




251 posts in this topic
Marius-Zalistupid
Forever in our Hearts RIP

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10-17-2015, 05:03 PM -
#61
Roasters championship amirite Smug
Little Bit Of The Boycey
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10-17-2015, 05:06 PM -
#62
Fuck you for getting in first with that joke VS Mugbie On a new page as well so I thought I was on to a winner Laugh
Neilson Schmeilson
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10-17-2015, 05:11 PM -
#63
Love a Tassimo americano.
Marius-Zalistupid
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10-17-2015, 05:19 PM -
#64
(10-17-2015, 05:06 PM)Francis Begbie Wrote: Fuck you for getting in first with that joke VS Mugbie On a new page as well so I thought I was on to a winner Laugh
Shitwine 
Andy Hallidacey
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10-17-2015, 05:27 PM -
#65
Was pumped for weighing in with "that's what I call a roasting championship". Woy
(08-02-2018, 09:04 AM)Mags Wrote: The answer is Yes.
[Image: 2nUdIl1.png]

Walter Boycechak
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10-17-2015, 05:30 PM -
#66
We can, at least, all agree on something. ABSALUTE ROASTERS.
Chris Benoit
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10-17-2015, 05:32 PM -
#67
Got a coffee place down the road from us that has a great selection. Sent the wife down to get some Blue Mountain coffee because I loved it when we were over in Jamaica for our honeymoon. She came in seething, £34 for a fucking bag of it. Didn't ask how much it was and didn't want to look like a tink by saying no after she'd asked for it Laugh

Aldi actually does some nice ground coffee for around £2-£3 a bag.
Little Bit Of The Boycey
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10-17-2015, 05:43 PM -
#68
(10-17-2015, 05:19 PM)Vlad-Stupid Wrote: Shitwine 


Don't get me wrong, I possied you for making a great, great joke Shitwine
I.J
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10-18-2015, 02:47 AM -
#69
"Roasters by name, roasters by nature"

Warnock
Walter Boycechak
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01-15-2016, 11:44 AM -
#70
Following on from the seethe thread and the failure of at least 50% of cretins masquerading as baristas, to make a fucking coffee, I think it's time they changed the system.

Can I have a macchiato with a little extra hot milk, surely not hard? Cunt in starbucks (it was in a hotel I was staying in) served me a giant milk thing with caramel on top. Tim

Solution? A number system. You order according to many parts coffee, how many parts milk and how many parts froth you want.

The perfect coffee is obviously a 2:1:1, but even weirdos who would want a 1:4:0 are accommodated.
Roger H. Sterling
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01-15-2016, 11:54 AM -
#71
Just order a flat white. Or say how many shots you want instead of asking for an extra one. Most coffees are double shot to begin with, in that they use a large basket of coffee. Just has a for a triple shot whatever drink you have. Tbf to the cunt, extra hot and extra shot are pretty similar when said with a lisp.
Little Bit Of The Boycey
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01-15-2016, 12:25 PM -
#72
[Image: Screen-Shot-2014-04-03-at-9.54.24-PM.png]

"A triple soy skinny macchiato, served at 160 degrees in a 2:1:1 ratio of course, yeah?"
Shteve
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01-15-2016, 12:39 PM -
#73
I'm all about the no nonsense Nescafe azera, for men. Can't be arsed with these wee fiddly frothy coffees that they hit you with.
Walter Boycechak
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01-15-2016, 12:59 PM -
#74
(01-15-2016, 11:54 AM)Roger H. Sterling Wrote: Just order a flat white. Or say how many shots you want instead of asking for an extra one. Most coffees are double shot to begin with, in that they use a large basket of coffee. Just has a for a triple shot whatever drink you have. Tbf to the cunt, extra hot and extra shot are pretty similar when said with a lisp.

Sick burn.

Since the flat white has gone mainstream, it's become milkier. Not a reliably consistent drink across the board now. I think the lassie in the shop mumbled it to the girl making the coffees, thus the confusion. Also, we've been here before, but asking for an extra shot and getting "there are already two shots in here, you sure you want another?" Perhaps you're right I should just say 'triple shot' from now on.
Frank Uchewood
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01-15-2016, 01:02 PM -
#75
Have you tried a double macchiato in Costa, Walt? That is close to a 2:1:1 ratio.

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Marius-Zalistupid
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01-15-2016, 01:03 PM -
#76
(01-15-2016, 01:02 PM)Frank Underwood Wrote: Have you tried a double macchiato in Costa, Walt? That is close to a 2:1:1 ratio.

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A personal favorite. Had one on the way to work today.
Sterling Archer
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01-15-2016, 01:04 PM -
#77
(01-15-2016, 12:59 PM)Walter Sobchak Wrote: Sick burn.

Since the flat white has gone mainstream, it's become milkier. Not a reliably consistent drink across the board now. I think the lassie in the shop mumbled it to the girl making the coffees, thus the confusion. Also, we've been here before, but asking for an extra shot and getting "there are already two shots in here, you sure you want another?" Perhaps you're right I should just say 'triple shot' from now on.

Fat Cunt

Yeah, you see everywhere doing them now and you just know that they won't have a fucking clue what they're doing.
Roger H. Sterling
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01-15-2016, 01:15 PM -
#78
(01-15-2016, 12:59 PM)Walter Sobchak Wrote: Sick burn.

Since the flat white has gone mainstream, it's become milkier. Not a reliably consistent drink across the board now. I think the lassie in the shop mumbled it to the girl making the coffees, thus the confusion. Also, we've been here before, but asking for an extra shot and getting "there are already two shots in here, you sure you want another?" Perhaps you're right I should just say 'triple shot' from now on.

It was lazy but I'll take it.

Most proper coffee shops will do you a proper flat white. And even if they don't, they should understand it as "strong coffee". Surely if it's milkier, it just becomes a latte? That's assuming they don't know the difference between an espresso and a ristretto.

But basically, yeah. To avoid confusion, tell them how many shots you want and they can't get it wrong.
Staunch Halliday
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01-15-2016, 01:28 PM -
#79
Flat whites are only decent in oz
Monty Oh You
Frank Uchewood
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01-15-2016, 01:29 PM -
#80
(01-15-2016, 01:15 PM)Roger H. Sterling Wrote: It was lazy but I'll take it.

Most proper coffee shops will do you a proper flat white. And even if they don't, they should understand it as "strong coffee". Surely if it's milkier, it just becomes a latte? That's assuming they don't know the difference between an espresso and a ristretto.

But basically, yeah. To avoid confusion, tell them how many shots you want and they can't get it wrong.

But it's not a strong coffee. The issue with the flat white is that it varies from place to place. But in New Zealand and Australia, you can get a single and a double flat white, much like how you can get a single and a double latte, or cappuccino.

For a flat white specifically, you want to take the NZ/Australia way of making the drink. The best description is that it is a 'failed cappuccino'. Even that isn't great.

The difference between Flat White/Latte/Cappuccino is the milk and how it is formed. Liquid heated milk/frothy milk/microfoam. You can make a single of each of those drinks, but it's how the milk interacts with the espresso what the different between the drinks is realised.

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